(no subject)

[somedaybitch]

a toy soldier tells the story in his own words.

24 January 2005: The interrogators were relentless. But I gave them only my name, rank, and UPC code.

They mocked my fear. "It better here than American prison, yes? We read all about atrocities performed on Iraqi action figure POWs."

"What happened at the Island of Misfit Toys," I hissed, "was not policy. That was just some crazy rogue reindeer, screwing around unsupervised. Santa Claus will still be confirmed by 75-80 votes in the Senate."

As I huddle in the shoebox that will soon define the four corners of my world, my thoughts turn to my wife, Barbie; my brother, Fireman Rescue Hero; and my son, Lego Luke Skywalker. I must be strong for them.

heh

Comments

[spiderbaggins.livejournal.com]

LOLOLOLOL

Oh god thank you Sis.

[somedaybitch.livejournal.com]

ya just gotta appreciate a guy with a wicked sense of humor and too much time on his hands.

[wishkey.livejournal.com]

*snicker*

[thevaliumsofalj.livejournal.com]

*snort* :lol: love it!

did you see this one? http://www.scrappleface.com/MT/archives/002050.html

Captive U.S. Soldier Doll Rescued by Bush Doll
by Scott Ott

(2005-02-01) -- Just hours after Islamic militants in Iraq threatened to behead a kidnapped U.S. soldier doll, the camouflaged action figure was rescued in a daring nighttime operation by a toy George W. Bush action figure.

The nine-inch-tall replica of the president left Andrews Air Force Base in a scale model of Air Force One within minutes after the Pentagon learned of the kidnapping from a picture on an Islamic website.

The top-secret flight was reminiscent of the life-size president's Thanksgiving visit to Baghdad in 2003. During the long trip, the presidential doll was programmed to say intimidating things in Arabic, and reportedly spent several hours practicing his kung-fu grip.

Even as the mission was secretly under way, Sen. Edward M. Kennedy, D-MA, went before the Senate to call for the immediate withdrawal of 12,000 military action figures from Iraq.

Upon hearing of the Bush doll's successful mission, Sen. John Kerry, D-MA, warned against "overhyping" the significance of the apparently heroic deed.

[thevaliumsofalj.livejournal.com]

OMG!!! After taking several crash language courses at the Army facility in Monterrey, I could speak all the major tongues. Monchichi. Teddy Bear. Cabbage Patch. Smurf.

*spew* :lol: